Im at strip club and am horny
id be glad to
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
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