Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
