great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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