did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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