Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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