i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
What a dumb baby whore.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Randomize
