sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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