So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
