To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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