So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I party with great urgency now.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
