So drunk, too bad you don't want this
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
