He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
