Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
