I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
