her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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