After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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