Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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