I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
