chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
