thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Found your dick twin last night
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize