Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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