I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
