I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
