i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
