pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
