we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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