By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
