I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
