whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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