He passed out mid-signature
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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