For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I could have mohawked her pubes.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
