Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
