yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
