Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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