I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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