I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
