worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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