Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
