He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize
