I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
