Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
