I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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