First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
