we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
