jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
