i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
