she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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