just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
