Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
