Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Randomize
